We were still young and naive about many things that life would present us, less jaded and more carefree. I say jaded, but that mainly seems to be my problem. My husband seems to be more easy going than me and that must be why we are such a good match. He has calmed me down and I have made him more organized. He is definitely my better half and I am his. God made us perfectly for each other, we still have our imperfections but with God with us we can make it through anything.
With all of our recent fertility struggles, I feel like we have grown towards each other and for that I am grateful. I know that there is a chance that I may still get pregnant with just the Femara or Clomid, but the struggle has definitely taken a toll on me. Mentally I have been through the depths of valley and have been continually learning my need to rely on God more and more.
I finally decided that I cannot do this alone and that I need to have backup and strength to help me fight this battle with less stress and more confidence. I recently went to a counselor, who is faith based counselor and I am working with her to help me learn ways to decrease my stress to hopefully help with our fertility. She is wonderful and has helped me release some of my resentment towards those who haven't been very supportive or sensitive to us while we have been on this journey. Instead of wishing ill will towards them, I am now working on praying and leaving it in God's capable hands to teach them empathy.
Don't get me wrong, we have had some wonderful friends who have been very sensitive to us and have been very open about what is going on in their lives and for that I am grateful. I just wish that everyone could be like that, but that is not how this world works. Satan is trying to find ways to make us fall and he will use anything he can, but I know that my God is stronger and will always win that fight.
I still need prayers but I know that I have some wonderful people in my corner and that makes this journey easier.
For our anniversary, Nate and I went to Chateau Avalon. I had heard many wonderful things about it, but was kind of disappointed for the price. I felt that for the $$ I could have done something else and gotten more out of it. Our room was very small and not at all what we had expected. The best thing about it was that it did give Nate and I some alone time to enjoy, so in that sense it was great. I was able to shop for myself without having a toddler racing in and out of the racks of clothing and laughing. I do admit that I missed that little giggling face but it is nice to shop and be able to look at what you are shopping for. Here is a picture of our room.
The bath was the best part of the room.
My parents watched Landon and when we got home Sunday morning, my dad had infiltrated my son and dressed him in all KU clothes. I do have to admit, he was adorable as always in his Jayhawk attire. Someday when he is old enough, he will have the choice over which Kansas team he will cheer for. I want it to be his choice, not mine for him.
Here he is......
Over Thanksgiving weekend, Nate decided to make french toast with Landon. Landon absolutely LOVED cooking with his Dad. It was adorable to watch. We even took video.
Until next time I leave you readers knowing that our God is an awesome God and He will provide us with what He knows is best for us, even if we don't understand His reasons.
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